Tomorrow, April 27th, will be the one year anniversary of my suicide attempt. From the outside, it could appear that I was at my weakest moment. However, I believe I was at my strongest moment. In that moment, I learned what radical obedience is all about.
I recently became comfortable talking about that night and here is what I remember. I can remember God telling me “Try and take your life. I won’t let you. How much do you trust me Marc? Do you trust me with your life?” As I reflect on that moment, I tried to find something in the Bible that I could relate this to. Almost instantly the story of Abraham and Isaac came to mind.
The Lord told Abraham to sacrifice his son Isaac, but at the last moment the Lord spared Isaac’s life. Here is what it says in Genesis 22:12:
12 “Do not lay a hand on the boy,” he said. “Do not do anything to him. Now I know that you fear God, because you have not withheld from me your son, your only son.”
Now why would God do something like this. God wanted to test Abraham because He had an awesome plan for his life, that could only be found through radical obedience. Genesis 22:17-18 states:
17 I will surely bless you and make your descendants as numerous as the stars in the sky and as the sand on the seashore. Your descendants will take possession of the cities of their enemies, 18 and through your offspring[b] all nations on earth will be blessed,[c]because you have obeyed me.”
I don’t claim to know exactly why God allows tests and trials in our lives, but I do know this. Each test is perfectly situated for where you are right now. God is a God of love and He wants the best for His children.
The next time you go through a test remember the source. All tests and trials come from God and are perfectly designed to bring you closer to Him.
Grace and Peace,